I can’t write. 

Still reading The Bondage Breaker. It’s really good at exposing misconceptions and using scripture to show the truth. Last night, the scripture was Romans 7:15-25. I loved it because it was so relatable. I understood exactly what Paul was expressing. Journal #5 is completed, and I’m starting journal #6 tonight.
There are outside forces that attack us everyday. A virus enters your body, infects one cell, and then those cells multiply. Pretty quickly, the sickness dominates, and antibiotics don’t work with viruses. I think that’s what the world tries to do. 
The world seeps into a tiny crack of insecurity, and uses that foothold to its advantage. It heads for the immune system, our only form of defense. War is waged and the battle ensues as shrill alerts ring. Do you ever feel like one insecurity or doubt tunnels into two, three, and so on? Eventually, it seems to gather more troops, swarming and attacking at all angles. They go for your loved ones, your fears, your aching, your past, your doubts. It pries open that part of you that nobody’s ever seen and raises it up a flag pole, begging for attention.
So, what’s this called, Amanda? I guess it’s called bondage.
It comes in many forms. There are many different types of viruses, and there’s many different types of bondage. I think it changes from person to person, depending on situations and the way we think. Even if it’s just an obstacle that’s currently in your life that’s hard to overcome.. something upsetting that’s nudging at your heart. Maybe it’s a mindset: I’m too needy, I’m overbearing, why is this happening, etc. Maybe it’s something happening in your life. Moving, sickness, school, work, a relationship.
This book says it’s all about fighting back and equipping ourselves with the truth. It’s about not giving up, not being passive, and confronting it. Learning the truth and hiding it in your heart will build the rest of your defenses up to be strong and powerful.
I’m not saying this is easy. It’s so freaking hard to even admit what’s weighing on your heart or tugging at your smile. But, hey, it happens. When someone gets sick, you don’t wonder “What did THEY do wrong?!” You just accept that it’s part of life, and it’s something to fight through. It’s the same way with this. It’ll all work out.

New favorite ALBUM: The Song Inside the Sounds of Breaking Down – John Mark McMillan